It is Mother’s Day. Lots of people are posting about their mother, and given our current dilemma in society, I had to look back at what I wrote after my mom passed away. She would probably say this is nothing compared to what she endured from 1927 to 2018. Keep in mind, she also had to endure me.
In memoriam. Tribute to the greatest generation. Outstanding in their field?
It has finally happened, my mom has passed, and I believe with my dad again. Losing mom isn't really that hard since I really lost her about 20 years ago when macular degeneration suddenly took her eyesight. I do not think she enjoyed much in life after she went blind, but as my older sister has pointed out, she was resourceful and resilient. Both my parents were cut from a different mold than many of us can even relate to.
Despite growing up in some truly trying times, they succeeded and were part of what Tom Brokaw called "the greatest generation". Even when they had the means, they rarely treated
themselves. And they never spoiled their 5 children. Many people today refer to losing a friend/relative in the terms of "celebration of life". As the first condolences came in I struggled some with those who used words to comfort my moms passing. Knowing the struggles she endured, especially the solitude that came after dad’s passing in 2009, I am relieved she has finally had the chance to meet her maker. She made her peace with God quite a while ago and was ready to move on long before her body would allow.
Given my life of work outdoors and the fact I was married and moved out by 21, it has been a long time since I relied on my mom. My dad retired from his factory job in 1982, the same year I took over the farm, and we spent much time together since he worked with me whenever an extra hand was needed up till 2008. I never got the chance to spend much time with my mom as an adult as I did with my dad. When I was a kid and a farmer in training, mom always provided the meals and really anything else that was needed, usually without complaint. She was behind the scenes, and her great attention to detail and duty helped the farm run successfully.
As earlier stated, the Kiefner children were not spoiled. I rarely got anything I wanted, but I always got what I needed. Growing up it may not have seemed important, but it now appears with many of the current issues and ills of society, that fulfilling our "needs" was perhaps the greatest form of love my parents could provide. My mom, like my dad, was not outwardly affectionate or loving.
Now the memories: I remember her throwing my brother Paul and me out of the house when we triumphantly ran in the kitchen after killing a skunk with the dogs. The countless hours in the garden and orchard and helping her can fruits and vegetables. The several times a year the whole family was conscripted into the hay fields and barn to bale hay. The weekly summer trips to downtown Joliet to Kroger and the public library. The summer vacations when dad’s factory job had its’ annual summer shutdown, especially the 3 weeks to California with a family of 7 in a 75’ Chevy sedan. Somehow we all made it home, alive! The numerous times she would round up dry clothes when we came in freezing from winter play and work. Lets not forget, rhubarb pie and cakes, baked mac-n-cheese, peach cobbler, brownies, cookies, lasagna - you get the idea.
So, to end on a positive note, my resourceful and resilient mom, who suffered for the past several years, is now reborn. I hope to see my parents again, but not too soon.
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